This is absolutely stunning. I'm in awe here so you'll have to forgive me my incoherent thoughts as the spill out.
First thing, I love the concept bethind this -- the idea of Desmond unable to leave the island and having to make that heartbreaking decision to let Penny go, to save her. And then Sayid, after everything he has lost making the decision to go back to the island, to go back to Desmond.
Already there's this "connection" of understanding between them, but what I truly admire in your story is the time you take to move them along that line from a more general understanding to genuine friendship and then to lovers. It doesn't feel rushed or put upon. It feels like a very natural progression who they are and what they come to mean to each other, with each other.
The details you sprinkle throughout give this an emotional realism, such as Sayid's continual reference to imagining Desmond taking that final swim, Desmond's whisky breath, doing dishes and cooking dinner, watching movies, discussions that become more layered, Sawyer's clothes, ghosts living in a ghost town. And then once they've crossed that line (and I enjoy the sense of two people who truly find a connection with each other) those mentions of classical music and kisses along the back of the neck, the sensitive spt on the hips. It feels like I'm right inside Sayid's mind and looking through his eyes at it all unfold...as he tries to make sense of what exactly it is between them that he can't put into words but it is so real and undeniable...and unavoidable.
One of the most touching moments is towards the end when Desmond finally says Sayid's name and for both it's like that final piece has fit into place. It's not about denying Penny or Nadia. It's something else altogether and it's as true as anything else they've experienced and loved.
Sorry for the long ramble, I just found this story to be incredibly touching and well written.
no subject
Date: 2008-04-26 12:40 am (UTC)First thing, I love the concept bethind this -- the idea of Desmond unable to leave the island and having to make that heartbreaking decision to let Penny go, to save her. And then Sayid, after everything he has lost making the decision to go back to the island, to go back to Desmond.
Already there's this "connection" of understanding between them, but what I truly admire in your story is the time you take to move them along that line from a more general understanding to genuine friendship and then to lovers. It doesn't feel rushed or put upon. It feels like a very natural progression who they are and what they come to mean to each other, with each other.
The details you sprinkle throughout give this an emotional realism, such as Sayid's continual reference to imagining Desmond taking that final swim, Desmond's whisky breath, doing dishes and cooking dinner, watching movies, discussions that become more layered, Sawyer's clothes, ghosts living in a ghost town. And then once they've crossed that line (and I enjoy the sense of two people who truly find a connection with each other) those mentions of classical music and kisses along the back of the neck, the sensitive spt on the hips. It feels like I'm right inside Sayid's mind and looking through his eyes at it all unfold...as he tries to make sense of what exactly it is between them that he can't put into words but it is so real and undeniable...and unavoidable.
One of the most touching moments is towards the end when Desmond finally says Sayid's name and for both it's like that final piece has fit into place. It's not about denying Penny or Nadia. It's something else altogether and it's as true as anything else they've experienced and loved.
Sorry for the long ramble, I just found this story to be incredibly touching and well written.