janie_tangerine | cowt 13 S1 M1: it's the end of the world as we know it (asoiaf, jaime/brienne, pg13)

it's the end of the world as we know it (a song of ice and fire, jaime/brienne, pg13)

Jaime doesn’t remember the last time he actually saw sunlight.

He used to ask Brienne, she used to keep count, but — not lately.

Sorry, she said the last time he asked, I missed one day and then it all blurred together.

It’s fine, he had answered, does it even matter now?

It hadn’t. It really hadn’t.

He doesn’t know how long it’s been since then, but it must have been… days. Weeks? Maybe. The Wall is a ruin, the few people left (them included) hoarding the few rooms that are still inhabitable. He doesn’t know how long will the fire reserves last. They had quite a lot in Castle Black’s former main hall, but no one has gone out for them lately, and how? It’s so dark no one can see, and the fire immediately goes out because the air is too cold.

Sometimes he wonders if they should have tried to go South, then he remembers the last letter from Tyrion that actually reached them.

All things considered, he’d rather die frozen than burned to a crisp. He saw enough people follow that fate to wish anything but that.

I’m sorry, he had told her… a few days ago, he thinks. It all blurs, at this point. He thinks he’s slept a while for three times, since, so.

For what?, Brienne had replied, her hand grasping his under the covers.

I mean, when we rescued Sansa Stark and thought we’d actually pass for decent knights, I told you we’d roam around Essos righting wrongs and shit if you had enough of Westeros. This wasn’t exactly in the plans.

I don’t think the literal end of the war is your fault, she had laughed, softly.

He was so damned grateful she still could.

That’d be too much even for me, he hard snorted, but still. I don’t know. I hate I can’t keep that promise.

It’s all right. You kept it.

She fell asleep just after and he never asked.

But right now —

He thinks the weather just got colder.

He doesn’t know how long it is before they all freeze to death. He might as well asked.

What do you mean, I kept it?

You knighted me and gave me a quest that you finished with me, Brienne replies, moving closer. That’s more than I ever thought I would get. And then you gave me this, and what could I ask for more?

Her lips press against his cheek and he feels like crying.

Seven Hells, that’s not — you’re what, one and twenty? Two and twenty? I wasted most of my life but at least I got to live it. You didn’t deserve —

You didn’t either, she interrupts him, kissing his cheek again, her hand grasping at his hip as he shakes his head and hides his head in her shoulder.

I don’t know, but thank you nonetheless, wench.

You’re welcome. I only tell the truth.

Her hand finds his hair, carding through it — fuck, it got really long, didn’t it? Hers is longer, too.

Sometimes he wishes he could have seen their children be born and he could actually father them.

But the world is ending in days and unless Jon Snow shows up from beyond the black nothing he disappeared into when the sun stopped rising for some kind of miracle… he thinks there is no chance for that.

He holds her closer.

I love you, you know, he tells her, not remembering the last time he told her. It’s important she knows, he thinks. Just in case they don’t wake up tomorrow.

I love you, too, she whispers in the darkness as her lips find the back of his throat and she pulls him closer.

Maybe they’re doomed, but he’s glad he’s here. It’s a small room but it’s theirs and the door is sturdy and if death finds them here, at least he won’t hate it so much, not if she’s with him.

End.